Issue601
Jess: I had a great time last night.
Solomon: Yeah me too, we should do it again soon.
Jess: How bout tonight?
Solomon: Tonight is great. Provided Dick doesn’t keep us here all night.
Jess: Yeah do you know anything about the case?
Solomon: Not really. Johnny will fill us in when we get down to the morgue.
Jess: Johnny?
Solomon: Yeah. You know. Johnny. The mortician.
Jess: Oh! That Johnny. Right.
Solomon: What? You thought I meant the new guy? The intern?
Jess: Ha ha! Yeah. Silly me.
Elsewhere, in the morgue, Dick and Johnny the mortician examine a body on the table- the body is not shown. Dick looks concerned, but Johnny is all aloof and weird and stuff. Maybe he is on drugs.
Dick: You’re sure?
Johnny: Absolutely, mate.
Dick: We’re gonna get these sons of bitches.
Johnny: The Luitenniant is bringing in an outside Agent to help on the case. She’s a bloody specialist, been following the Cartels for a while apparently.
Dick: Federal? From the FBMI*?
Johnny: DEAD*, I believe, mate. Cheerio.
*Federal Bureau of Medical Investigations
**Drug Enforcement Agency of Doctors. (Writers Note: HOW AWESOME IS THAT ACRONYM???)
Solomon and Jess arrive at the morgue.
Solomon: Hey, Dick. Johnny. What’s up?
Johnny: Ahoy! Gruesome case we’ve got on our hands here, Mateys. We found a corpse full of bullet holes with a crying baby in his arms. And the baby is loaded up with drugs. Its a baby drug smuggling ring from Mexico. Bloody awful stuff, mate.
Jess: That’s terrible!
Solomon: Babies and drugs? The cartel? Say, Dick, uh, any chance the DEAD will be assisting with this case? Sending a Pediatriciagent perhaps?
Dick: Absolutely. Ah look, that must be her now.
Enter, Jenny.
Jenny: Hola. I am the DEAD agent sent here to assist on the drug baby smuggling case. Oh. Hello, Solomon.
Jess: Solomon? You know her?
Solomon: She’s…my wife!
TO BE CONTINUED…
MAXmail
Romeo: YES! I knew you would have to like that one!
Victoria: Well done, Walter.
Romeo: Thanks, Victoria!
Max: But you really want Jennifer Lopez, Ben Affleck's Ex-Fiance, to play his wife?
Romeo: Yes! They will be perfect! She does a show with her ex-husband, so why not her ex-fiance as well? Don't worry, they are obviously not still together, so they will have an easy time acting out their marital quarrels! It'll be so dramatic!
Victoria: Not to mention the fact that JLo is a hollow shell of a person who would sell her soul for attention.
Max: WOW! That came from out of nowhere. And it was awesome. She is SO hired.
Romeo: O_O Victoria! I am shocked.
Victoria: Anyway, Walter, this looks like a promising episode. Good work.
Romeo: Thanks! I decided to split it up according to commercial breaks so that you could feel the suspense!
Max: No. No no no no no- no way. You are not getting off that easily. We are continuing this conversation.
Romeo: Huh?
Victoria: Ugh. He was talking to me, Walter. Send that second part. We'll get back to you. He is likely on his way to my desk. Yup. Here he comes. With a big dumb smirk on his face, of course.
Romeo: :O uh-oh! Good luck, Victoria! Talk to you soon.